


Redemption

by captainraz



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, F/M, Gen, Redemption, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-12
Updated: 2015-02-12
Packaged: 2018-03-12 02:35:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3340409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainraz/pseuds/captainraz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Nerys, you were right, we are long past the point where an apology is sufficient. But maybe I can find some way to redeem myself..."</p>
<p>Set at the end of the season 6 war arc.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Redemption

Odo stared at the door for a long time after the Female Changeling had left. His internal substance roiled and his thoughts were all in turmoil. The Founder had promised him clarity but she had brought him the opposite; his thoughts and feelings had never been as conflicted as they were now. And his inability to keep a clear head had gotten Rom arrested and Kira sentenced to death. He was glad she had escaped, but he was still left with troublesome thoughts.

In his minds’ eye he could still see the boiling fury on her face after he had tried to apologise. Her angry voice still rang in his ears, telling him just how far past sorry they were. But even Kira’s anger hadn’t been enough to break the spell of the Link. It had taken the look on the Founder’s face as she announced Kira’s execution to do that. Whatever influence she had been exerting over him had shattered in that moment. He’d realised how dire their situation was and what his betrayal might have cost them. Remembering his awful behaviour towards his friend he felt ashamed. Powerful waves of guilt and sorrow rocked him, threatening his ability to hold his shape. He tried to control himself, to decide on a course of action so he could do something useful.

He managed to clear his mind enough to form a partial plan. It wasn’t much, but it was the only course of action that had presented itself. Besides sitting in his quarters and shaking, which was what he was currently doing. What he was planning to do was out of character for him, but then, he’d not been himself for days. He knew he had to do this; it was the right thing to do, it was the _just_ thing to do. There would be no justice left in the Alpha Quadrant if the Dominion won. He could not stand by while his people killed his friends and _their_ people. The Founders would sweep away their diverse and wonderful cultures unless someone found a way to stop them. He wasn’t sure he could do much on his own, but he had to try. He owed it to Kira. She would be willing to die to prevent them from winning, and Odo knew that he had to be too. He slapped his comm badge.

“Odo to security.”

 

***

The phaser blast slammed into the bulkhead, having just narrowly missed Kira’s head. She cursed as she swung round to blindly return fire. She was just hoping to keep the Cardassians off her tail long enough to find some sort of cover. Running fire fights were always tiring, and she knew that they wouldn’t be able to keep it up much longer. She and Rom needed to find somewhere to hide; if they ran out of breath they’d be gunned down.

“This way!” she shouted to her companion, and they ducked into cargo bay.

Kira slammed her fist into the control panel, breaking it. At least the Cardassians wouldn’t be able to come after them until they were long gone. Weaving through the crates and boxes she headed towards the other end of the cargo bay. Rom followed close behind. Before they could get there the doors opened and three Jem’Hadar charged in, guns blazing. Kira dived behind a pile of crates, and dragged Rom down with her. She tried to return fire but found herself hopelessly outgunned and unable to get her head above the parapet to aim.

She took the opportunity to catch her breath as she listened to the phaser fire. She looked over at her companion, who had a puzzled look on his face.

“Do you hear that?” he asked. “That’s Bajoran phaser fire.”

Kira frowned. “Why would Dominion troops be using Bajoran weapons?”

The sounds of phaser fire stopped abruptly, causing Kira and Rom to exchange a cautious look. They emerged from behind the crates and saw the bodies of the Jem’Hadar on the floor. The smoke cleared to reveal their rescuers; four Bajoran security deputies. One of them stepped over a corpse to address Kira.

“Major Kira, Constable Odo sent us to give you a hand.”

Relief flooded through her body. It didn’t quite douse the flame of her anger towards Odo but she thrust it aside for now.

“Come on,” she said to her new-found allies. “We’ve got work to do.”

 

***

He was halfway down the corridor before he realised he had no idea what he planned to do next. All he had in mind were vague notions of doing whatever it took to stop the Dominion armada. Odo brought himself to an abrupt stop, giving himself time to think. He knew that every second wasted put his friends that much closer to death, but he couldn’t do much without a plan.

A ship. If he was going to achieve anything at all, he was going to need a ship.

His humanoid legs would take far too long to get him to the docking ring. Seeing no other option, Odo shot upwards, a roaring column of gold and dived into the maintenance ducts. He came out in the docking ring, close to where he knew one of the Dominion cruisers was berthed. It was almost too easy to gain access to the ship; the Jem’Hadar guards didn’t question the presence of a Founder.

Learning how to operate the ship was also far too simple; Odo just pulled the memories he had recently acquired from the Link. How ironic that the thing that had led him to this point would also be his salvation. He knew he would never get clearance to depart from Ops, and they were probably too busy to answer his hail. He blew the docking clamps manually. Losing a single docking pylon would be the least of their worries if that Dominion armada made it through the wormhole.

The ship pulled away from the station and then Odo was stuck. His plan had only taken him this far, and he had no idea what he was going to do now.

 

***

Rom ran a little way ahead and scouted round a corner before giving Kira the all clear signal. She in turn gave it to the deputy behind her; for now they had outrun the Jem’Hadar. Things weren’t likely to stay that way for long, not without disabling the internal sensors anyway.

Kira was just debating the pros and cons of splitting the party so someone could do just that when the red alert klaxon sounded. She threw a confused glance at Rom who shrugged helplessly. They hadn’t done anything to set the alert off, or at least, nothing they hadn’t been doing for half an hour already. Whatever had caused the red alert to go off must have been outside the station.

“All right people, lets keep moving,” Kira shouted. “We’ve got a job to do.”

They continued down the corridor with the caution. Kira was hoping they could take advantage of any ensuing chaos. Still, she was cautious: they couldn’t afford to assume the Dominion’s attention would be elsewhere. One of Odo’s deputies radioed in and confirmed what they had suspected; it wasn’t them who’d set the alarm off. Apparently someone had blown a set of docking clamps and stolen a Jem’Hadar warship.

Kira hoped that whoever was responsible was on their side. Or at least, had intentions that ran parallel to their own.

They reached the access hatch Rom needed to get into the central core. The deputies kept guard while she stuffed Rom inside. She threw her phaser rifle inside and then jumped in herself. One of the deputies, Adan, sealed her in. Then the security team went off to stall the Cardassians as much as they could. Kira slung her rifle over her shoulder and she and Rom began their arduous trek through the crawlspace to the core.

“Uh, sure is slow going,” Rom commented, more to break the silence than anything else.

“You better hope were not so slow that they detonate the minefield before we get to the central processor.”

Rom put his head down and crawled faster.

 

***

The computer bleeped again and Odo made another attempt to find out how to turn the damn comms off. Ops had been trying to hail him for the last five minutes; no doubt wanting to know who he was and what he was doing with the ship.

He wished he had an answer the to last question.

Odo finally found the comms panel and turned off the infernal beeping. He knew that with communications severed the staff in Ops would be even more concerned about their hijacked ship. He swung around, cursing the disorientation the headset was causing him and looked at the station. The weapons sails were activating; he would soon find himself under fire.

He knew that even in a Jem’Hadar warship he was no match for the station. Very soon he would be in big trouble. There was a flash off his starboard side as another of the self-replicating mines was deactivated.

His mind was still so scrambled from the Link that he had completely forgotten they were using the deflector to generate the anti-graviton beam. Now that he had a ship-and some idea how to use it he could do something to help. A destroyed deflector array would be a small price to pay if he could stop the Dominion armada coming through the wormhole.

The deflector was a much more sensible target. If he could stop them deactivating the mines then the Alpha Quadrant would be safe. But he didn’t want the Dominion personnel in Ops to guess at his true purpose. There was a chance that Kira and the others were working to disable the deflector from the inside. No matter what, he had to keep the Dominion’s attention focussed on him. He fired up his engines and headed off towards the wormhole before coming about to make a pass at the station.

Odo programmed in a firing pattern that would hit the deflector array as well as some other key areas. His intention was to throw Weyoun and the Founder off his true target. He fired at Ops, the weapons arrays, and the docking ring–he didn’t want to risk hurting any of the Bajoran civilians on the Promenade. Bright streaks of fire leaped up where his torpedoes connected; they hadn’t had time to get their shields up.

_That will have gotten their attention_ , he thought.

Time was of the essence here. The minefield would be coming down in a matter of minutes and after that volley they would be mobilising warships of their own.

He came about and programmed in another run.

  

***

Rom had his head stuck in the guts of the station and isolinear chips and bits of wiring were flying everywhere. He was furiously trying to take down the anti-graviton beam. Tempers flared as he raced get the deflector taken down in time.

“How much longer have we got?” he asked nervously.

“Ten minutes, maybe twelve,” Kira replied.

“I don’t think I’m gonna make it,” he said. “I’ll need another twenty minutes at least to get the anti-graviton beam taken down.”

“Can you disable the main computer from here? Or the weapons systems? After the mines are deactivated they still need to detonate them.”

“I can get to weapons from here, but I still need fifteen minutes.”

“You have ten, Rom. The fate of the Alpha Quadrant rests on your shoulders.”

“Er no pressure then,” said Rom sarcastically. He looked terrified, but Kira laid a hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

“Take a deep breath,” she said. You can do it.”

Rom closed his eyes briefly, swallowed, and did as he was told. Then he dived back behind the panel and begin ripping things out with even more fervour. He was just beginning to build up some momentum when suddenly the entire station rocked. Kira knew that particular feeling; a brief sickening jolt as the artificial gravity flickered in the wake of an impact.

“Someone’s firing at us!” she said.

“That explains the red alert,” said Rom, his voice muffled by duranium panelling.

The station rocked again as their attacker levelled another volley at them.

“Whoever they are they might just buy us the time we need. Keep working Rom, maybe they’ll take out the deflector array for us.”

“But if I deactivate the weapons array the station won’t be able to defend itself. Whoever’s shooting at us could take out the whole station.”

Kira’s heart clenched at the thought of all the civilians—all the Bajorans—who were currently on the station. If they got this wrong, if they made the wrong call then all those people could end up dead. But if they did nothing and the Dominion came through the wormhole then they were as good as dead anyway. There was no guarantee that what they were doing wouldn’t get every one killed, but they had to try. They had to stop that minefield coming down if they could; had to buy enough time for the Federation to get here. So Kira drew on her resistance experience and hardened her heart against possible civilian casualties.

“We have to keep going. The only thing that matters is keeping that minefield up.”

“I’m not going to make it.”

“You have to try.”

The station rumbled a third time and Kira sent a prayer to the Prophets: _please let us get this done in time._

  

***

“We’re now in visual range of _Deep Space Nine_ ,” said Dax calmly.

“On screen.”

The familiar shape of the station appeared in the view screen. A quiet susurration of surprise went around the bridge at the sight of the Jem’Hadar warship circling around and firing on it.

“Dax, report!” snapped Sisko.

“I have no idea what’s going on Benjamin,” said Dax, pressing buttons and observing readouts. “Looks like someone on our side has hijacked one of their ships. I’m reading damage to Ops, the weapons array and the deflector.”

“Could they be trying to stop the Dominion bringing the minefield down?”

“Unknown, but it’s a possibility.”

“Alright old man, let’s go give them a hand.”

“ETA four minutes.”

Four minutes turned out to be too long. The _Defiant_ arrived at _Deep Space Nine_ just in time to watch the final mine be deactivated. Despite their unexpected ally’s attempts to disable the weapons, a phaser beam shot straight for the wormhole. The minefield—and the hopes of an entire quadrant—went up in an impressive display of pyrotechnics.

“Did we have a plan B, Benjamin?” Dax asked. Somehow she managed to remain calm and professional despite the fact everything had just gone horribly wrong.

Sisko steepled his fingers as he considered his next move. Before he could answer, the warship on the screen made a final attack run on the station. It strafed across the centre before veering off and diving into the wormhole.

“Follow that ship Commander.”

 

***

“Come on Rom, you have less than thirty seconds left!”

“Almost there. Got it! Wait I don’t got it.” Rom frantically cut a few more wires. “Done! Er…Uh oh.”

“Uh oh, what?”

“I think we were too late.

 

***

Odo watched the detonation of the minefield

If he had a heart it would have sank. Despite his best efforts he’d been unable to disable either the deflector or the weapons. Now there was nothing standing in the Jem’Hadar’s way; in a short amount of time the Federation would be overrun. Soon after, the entire Alpha Quadrant would fall.

And it was all his fault.

If he hadn’t been seduced by the Link; if he’d stayed loyal to his friends; if he’d managed to cripple the station. If he’d had managed to do any of these things then they might have a chance, and it was because of him that they didn’t.

He briefly teetered on the edge of giving in to his guilt and despair before gritting his simulated teeth. He wanted to redeem himself and he would, even if he had to die to do it. There was a chance, however remote, that his status as a Changeling might be of some use in turning back the tide of Jem’Hadar. And if not…well, he’d already done the unforgivable. Why not add one more thing to his list of sins?

Quickly pulling himself together, he programmed in one last attack run on the station. He hoped it might distract the staff in Ops enough to prevent them guessing his true purpose. The docking ring lit up in glorious fire and then he banked sharply to streak off towards the wormhole.

As he entered the whirling blue vortex his sensors alerted him to the presence of a familiar ship; the _Defiant_ had made it at last. His joy turned to despair a few moments later as they joined him in the passage of the wormhole. He didn’t want them there with him but he couldn’t do much about that. He concentrated on the task at hand, vowing that he’d get the _Defiant _ out if worst came to worst.

“Lead Jem’Hadar ship, this is the Founder Odo, please come in.” Silence. “Founder Odo to Dominion fleet, come in. Cease and desist your approach to the Alpha Quadrant. I repeat, cease and desist, return to the Gamma Quadrant.”

There was no reply. Either they weren’t receiving his transmission or they were ignoring it. As the seconds ticked away the armada closed in on him and the Alpha Quadrant. He would have to go with plan B.

Odo sent a warning to the _Defiant_ and pushed the buttons that would send his warp core into overload. He only hoped that Kira would forgive him.

 

***

“Dominion fleet has entered the wormhole,” Dax reported.

“On screen.”

The main viewer jumped to life and there they were; fifteen hundred enemy ships swarming like locusts, a malevolent shadow against the wall of the wormhole.

“Sir, we’re receiving a transmission from the Jem’Hadar warship,” said Bashir, who was at comms. “Text only. Captain, it’s Odo!”

“What does it say?”

“ ‘I’d get out of the wormhole if I were you.’ ”

“Dammit, what’s he doing?”

“Sir, his warp core is building towards critical,” said O’Brien. “Estimated time to breach, ninety seconds.”

“Benjamin, he’s on a collision course with the lead Dominion ship!”

“Can we beam him out before his core breaches?”

“Negative, sir,” said O’Brien. “Transporters are completely shot.”

Sisko slammed his fist down on the arm of his chair in frustration. “All right, old man, get us out of here.”

“Aye, sir.”

Dax executed an impressive manoeuvre to turn them about and sped back towards the Alpha Quadrant. Without being told, she switched to aft view so they could watch their friend’s final flight.

Odo’s warship collided with the lead Jem’Hadar vessel just seconds before his core breached. This set off a chain reaction which ignited the silithium in the wormhole, devouring the rest of the Dominion fleet. Everyone on the _Defiant_ bridge was silent as they watched the viewscreen. Their mouths fell open as the only route to the Gamma Quadrant went up in flames and took their friend with it. Soon after they burst out of the wormholes’ Alpha Quadrant exit, closely followed by a gout of flame. The wormhole flared brightly for a moment before collapsing in on itself.

Everything seemed to fall silent and still, as though the universe itself were holding its breath. At last Sisko spoke to break the silence.

“Dax, readings?”

“No sign of the warships Benjamin.”

“What about the wormhole?”

“Proton count is normal and I’m not reading any elevated neutrino levels. I don’t think the wormhole is there any more.”

Sisko rubbed his hands over his face. He wasn’t looking forward to telling the Bajorans that their Emissary had sacrificed the Prophets to stop the Dominion. But that was a problem for another day.

“Did any other ships make it through the Cardassian lines?”

“Three Galaxy class ships made it through sir. And the _Rotarran_ is leading a full squadron of Klingon ships. Reinforcements should be here in under an hour.”

“Hail the station. Let’s tell Dukat the good news.”

 

***

Rom and Kira were hunkered down in the bowels of the station, phasers held tightly. They knew something had gone wrong; knew they’d been too late to prevent the minefield coming down. But they weren’t going to give up just yet. If the Dominion was coming, and the Alpha Quadrant was about to be overrun, they would resist as long as they could. Both of them would rather die than be captured again, and they’d sworn to fight to their last breath.

Rom had managed to build them a barricade around the Jeffries tube they’d hidden in. It wasn’t a particularly good barricade. They’d made it out of what few materials they had to hand and it _might_ slow down any attackers. If this ended up being the last free part of the Alpha Quadrant then so be it. This turf was theirs—and theirs alone—either until they were dead or the Federation managed to reclaim the station.

“Uh, what do you think is happening out there?” asked Rom, fidgeting nervously.

“I imagine several hundred Jem’Hadar warships are pouring through the wormhole, ready to take over the Alpha Quadrant and kill or imprison everyone we love.”

“Sorry I asked.”

“Kira gave him a withering look, but before she could reply, an alarm sounded.

“Now what?”

Rom reached behind him to tap at an engineers console.“ Huh,” he said, surprised. “It looks like they’re evacuating. Dominion and Cardassian troops to proceed to their designated assembly points.”

Kira’s brow furrowed. “But we know they detonated the minefield. Why would they be evacuating the station? It makes no sense.”

“Maybe the Federation came to the rescue?”

“Maybe,” Kira said thoughtfully. “I don’t like this Rom: something is happening out there that we don’t know about. The Dominion should be planning their victory parade; there’s no way they should be evacuating right now.”

“What do we do then?”

“The evacuation order _could_ be genuine, but this could also be a trap designed to lure us out. We stay put until we hear something more definite.”

Rom seemed to trust Kira’s instincts and hunkered back down with his rifle. “Okay, we stay. I sure do hope Nog is okay though,” he said sadly.

Kira laid a hand on his arm. “Me too, Rom. Me too.”

 

***

“Long range sensors indicate that the Dominion fleet is headed back to Cardassian space,” said Dax. “Confirmed by our fighters Benjamin, they’re going home.”

“Signal the fleet to let them go. Focus our efforts on finding survivors and repairing our ships.”

“And what about Dukat and the personnel on the station?”

“We said we’d give them time to evacuate and I intend to keep that promise. Position us a few million kilometres off the docking ring. Close enough that they get a move on but not so close they get itchy trigger fingers. In the meantime Doctor, see if you can raise any of the Bajoran Militia. I want to know if we have any allies left on DS9.”

“Yes sir,” replied Bashir.

“Well Benjamin, it looks like you achieved your aim after all. We’ve given the Dominion a bloody nose and reclaimed _Deep Space Nine_ ,” said Dax.

Sisko sighed. “Yes, but at what cost? We lost hundreds of ships in that battle. And for what? To lose the strategic importance of the station anyway?” He rubbed his hands over his face. “What am I going to tell the Bajorans? ‘Hello, Kai Winn, First Minister Shakaar. The good news is you’re safe from the Dominion now; the bad news is we had to sacrifice the Prophets to achieve that.’ ”

“Sarcasm doesn’t suit you Ben,” Dax said in admonishment. “We don’t know for certain that the wormhole has been destroyed. The wormhole aliens—Prophets—whatever…They’ve surprised us before, they might have found a way to survive this.”

He cracked his first smile since before the battle. “You’re right, of course Dax. As soon as we can spare the personnel you get some teams out there to assess the damage.”

“Aye sir!”

“In the meantime…have all the Dominion ships departed?”

“They have sir,” said Bashir. “Bajoran personnel in Ops confirm evacuation is complete. They also confirm a full complement of Bajoran security on board. No known Bajoran casualties, militia or civilian. Both Jake and Major Kira are currently missing, but they were alive just a few hours ago. There are search parties looking for them right now.”

Sisko broke into a broad grin at that news. “Take us home Dax.”

“Yes sir!”

  

***

_ Lieutenant Adan to Major Kira. _

Kira ignored the chirp of her comm badge, wary of a Dominion trap. It sounded again anyway.

“Uh, you should probably answer that,” said Rom. “They’ll be able to trace the signal whether you answer or not, even through all this duranium.”

She sighed, annoyed, but he was right. She tapped her comm badge. “Kira here. What do you want, lieutenant? We were supposed to be running radio silence.”

_I know sir, but circumstances have changed. Dominion and Cardassian troops are evacuating the station and the Federation is on its way._

Beside her Rom gave a little whoop of victory, but Kira was still suspicious. She wouldn’t put anything past the Cardassians and the Dominion were even more devious.

“How do I know this isn’t some sort of trick to lure us out of hiding?”

_ I’ve got young Mr Sisko here if you want to talk to him. _

There was a rustle as the comm badge was passed over and then Jake’s voice came down the line. _Hi Nerys_ , he said excitedly. There was no trace of coercion whatsoever in his voice. Kira relaxed considerably.

“You okay Jake?”

_I’m fine. Ziyal’s pretty banged up but Nurse Jabara says she’s gonna be just fine. We’re just waiting for Doctor Bashir to get back before she’s discharged._

“They really did it then?”

_They did! I just spoke to dad and he says the Dominion have just finished evacuating the station. They’re waiting until the they’re back in Cardassian space and then the Defiant is gonna dock._

“I best get up there then.”

_ See you soon! _

Kira and Rom headed up to the Promenade as fast as they could. It was more or less empty, but the atmosphere was full of anticipation. Even better, there wasn’t any sign of Jem’Hadar or Cardassian soldiers. Rom just had time for a quick reunion with Leeta before the airlock doors rolled open to reveal the triumphant Federation personnel. Everyone on the Promenade erupted into applause, welcoming back the conquering heroes. Kira saw Jake go running up to his Dad and then Rom spotted Nog, who was no longer wearing a cadet’s uniform. She caught sight of Dax and went to welcome her friend back.

Jadzia looked tired and dirty but her face lit up as Kira approached her, and the Trill swung her into an enormous hug. When Dax finally let go both Miles and Julian stepped up to demand hugs as well. They exchanged greetings and congratulations and started catching up on the last three months. Kira noticed that behind the elation her friends’ expressions were guarded, almost bittersweet. She wondered what this last three months had cost them all. When she asked out loud the three of them shared a wary look that was tinged with sadness.

“Come with me,” said Dax. “I’ll explain.”

 

***

Sisko stepped into his office for the first time in over three months and finally felt like he was home. The place still smelled of Dukat—Benjamin had always thought the Cardassian had something of a greasy odour, like a kitchen in desperate need of a clean—but the stench would come out eventually. It had five years ago.

It was almost funny really. When Benjamin had first been assigned to Deep Space Nine he’d wanted to be literally anywhere else. Leaving it to the Dominion three months ago had been one of the hardest things he’d ever done. And he’d fought every waking moment ever since to get back. This was where he belonged, he could feel it in his bones.

The war was far from over, and they still needed to find out the final fate of the wormhole and the Prophets. There was still a lot of work to be done, but things felt just a little more right than they had yesterday. Despite the fact DS9 might have lost its strategic value, the Federation’s relationship with Bajor was completely up in the air and he had just lost a valued colleague and friend.

Benjamin had tried not to think of Odo. He’d tried not to let the Changeling’s death overshadow this victory or mar his reunion with Jake. But he’d have to deal with it sooner or later. They needed to piece together his final hours, if they could, and find out what had driven him to that particular course of action. And there would need to be some sort of service; Odo had always been well respected on the station even if he could be difficult to like. Kira would take it hard: he’d have to look out for her over the next few weeks or she might try to work herself to death.

He bent down to pick up his baseball from where the office’s previous inhabitant had left it and put it back in its proper place. It was definitely a day of mixed emotions, which made him all the more glad to be home.

 

***

When Kira finally returned to her quarters she immediately collapsed onto her couch and heaved a huge sigh. It had been a long, difficult day, and she was completely and utterly drained. The tiredness was bone deep, and she was emotionally fraught as well as physically exhausted. Kira couldn’t remember when she’d last slept; she’d started to lose track of time at some point in the holding cell. All that had mattered was the countdown to the minefield being disabled. She remembered counting down the hours, then the minutes and seconds in her head. And then the Dominion were leaving and the Federation were being welcomed back to the station as heroes.

Her friends were back; Dax and Sisko and the others. They were all back on the station and the Dominion had been driven back into Cardassian territory. The Alpha Quadrant was safe—for now—but at what cost? For Kira Nerys it felt like the price might be too high. Not just because of the thousands of Starfleet personnel who had died to get the _Defiant_ to DS9. She was thinking of her friend, and her gods.

Odo…

She closed her eyes against the wave of anguish that threatened to overwhelm her. Her grief for him was wrapped up in rage and disappointment and feelings of betrayal. And now, now there would be no resolution, not for Kira at least. She could barely sort out her feelings for Odo, let alone think about how she might resolve them.

Prayer. Prayer and meditation always helped. When all else failed the Prophets would be there to centre her and guide her. But she didn’t know if they would listen. She didn’t know if they would listen ever again. Kira didn’t know who she was without the Prophets; she’d lost her centre. She’d endured the deaths of most of the people she’d ever known, and she’d done so because she had her faith in the Prophets to console her. But what use were dead gods in her hour of need? How could she properly mourn the man who’d taken them away?

Kira dragged herself to her feet, intending to pray simply because she didn’t know what else to do. She thought she might bring her duranja out from where she’d stored it after Bareil’s passing. As she passed her desk she noticed she had a new message. She was tempted to ignore it. Surely it wasn’t so important that it couldn’t wait until morning. But something in her gut told her to go open it and she was glad she did. It was from Odo.

Maybe, just maybe, this message might explain why he’d done what he did. Maybe it would give her the answers she so desperately needed.

With a heavy heart she sat down at her desk and pressed play.

  

***

_ Several hours earlier … _

Odo felt better now that he knew his security team were on their way to help Kira, but somehow he needed to do more. There had to be something else he could do to help, but he couldn’t do it from his quarters.

“Computer, compose message to be sent to Major Kira’s personal computer terminal. Begin recording.

“Major…computer, pause and delete.

“Begin. Kira…pause and delete.

“Begin recording.

“Nerys, I wanted you to know that I really am truly sorry for what happened. But you were right, we are long past the point where an apology is sufficient. Maybe I can find some way to redeem myself.

“We both know that the minefield is coming down, and there’s nothing we can do about it. Even if the Federation makes it to the station they will be too late and too few to stop the Dominion; the Alpha Quadrant will be overrun and everyone we love will be dead.

“A few days ago that would have seemed insignificant, but no longer. I cannot stand by while my people annihilate everything I have ever known. It goes against everything I have ever been, everything I have ever believed. Someone has to stop them. I am a Changeling, a Founder; I may be the only one who can. But even if I can’t, I’ve got to try. Those warships must be stopped from coming through the wormhole, at any cost.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I have to do something. There’s a good chance I’ll end up dead no matter what I do, and I am sorry for whatever comes after. I hope that I can redeem myself, even just a little.

“I love you Nerys. I’m sorry I couldn’t be a better man. Goodbye.

“Computer, end recording.”


End file.
